Sign This!

I'm not much for protests and petition signing. I generally feel it's an exercise in futility and there are better things I can do with my life.

However, on this one occasion, I feel the need to get involved. I've provided a link below to the "Anti Uwe Boll" petition. Who is Uwe Boll? I'm glad you asked. Uwe Boll is without question the most remarkably TERRIBLE filmmaker in all of Hollywood. What "films" (I use that word very loosely) has he been a part of? "BloodRayne." "Alone in the Dark." BloodRayne 2." "In the Name of the King." "Alone in the Dark 2." "BloodRayne 3." The upcoming "Postal" which looks to be the biggest piece of crap ever allowed into a theater. People may actually die from how bad this movie will be.

If you've never seen one of these movies, you should feel very blessed. I've seen a lot of movies in my life and "In the Name of the King" ranks as one of the worst things EVER to come into existence. And I'm not just talking about movies, I mean ANYTHING. That movie has a place in hell right next to Hitler. It's terrible and from what I've seen, it's actually one of Boll's BETTER "films."

Anyway, apparently Uwe has promised to stop making movies if a certain number of people sign this petition. Will he keep his word? Probably not. He is, after all, Satan in the flesh and Satan often lies. Still, for once in my life, I feel like this is a cause worthy of getting behind. Uwe Boll must be stopped. For his own sake, I hope 1 billion people sign this thing and he keeps his word. Because if he doesn't, I'm afraid the next logical step in stopping him for good is public assassination.

Stop Uwe Boll

What A Difference A Day Makes

It's amazing how much the attitude of an entire town can change from one day to the next. For the last month everyone, including me, has written the Mavs off as done. For a while it was "they'll be lucky to get out of the first round" to "they'll be lucky to make the playoffs, period" to "let's hope they don't make the playoffs so we can keep our draft pick." I've been preparing my "How to Fix This Thing" for the day the team inevitably finds themselves sitting at home watching the Spurs and Celtics play in the Finals.

And yet one game, one late season win, seems to change everything. For the first time in 11 tries, the Mavs finally beat a team with a winning record. Not only did they beat a good team, they beat the Warriors, the team that is partially responsible for their recent collapse. Not only did they beat the Warriors, they DESTROYED them, beating them at their own game and making them look like the collection of bums that they are. Not only did they destroy them, they probably knocked them out of the playoffs in the process. Dirk played the role of Willis Reed to perfection, sparking the team while limping noticably. That dude is the nails. Anyone who doesn't think he's one of the toughest players in the league better have a certifiable mental illness. Howard took good shots, Kidd made incredible plays over and over, and (as Dirk put it), we finally had a Jason Terry sighting for the first time in who knows how long as he dropped in 31 points.

The attitude on the local sports talk stations was remarkably different from just yesterday. Fans were actually saying that this team could make a Finals run. A Finals run! Yesterday the majority of us, whether we were willing to admit it or not, were pretty much hoping the team would end up in the lottery rather than seeing the team take another first round loss. Today everything is completely back on track.

I'm not willing to go nearly that far. It's great to see the team come out and show some stones like they did last night; in fact I've been waiting for that for months. I liked the movement Howard brought, the shot selection Terry displayed, the way Kidd pushed the ball, and there's no question that Dirk is what keeps this team afloat. Still, they're a far cry from where they should be and beating the Warriors at home when they were on a back-to-back is hardly a statement of superiority. They are, however, on the right path. I want to see if they can come out and handle their business in LA, in Phoenix, in Utah, etc. Play some good ball AND win a couple of those games and I'll start drinking the Kool Aid again.